Renée Zellweger: Renée say

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RENEE-ZELLWEGER


Renée Zellweger: Renée say it ain’t so, or are you just trying to be ‘one of us’

This oh-so-lovely photo from People Magazine suggests that Renée was right on the money when she screamed at a group of paparazzi who were trying to take her photo last week, “I am a normal person!” Yes, sweet Renée, you most certainly are.


CLAY-AIKEN


Gee, Clay, the same setup did nothing for Tom Cruise, either. Trying to quash those rumours that he’s as gay as a 4th of July parade, failed American Idol Clay Aiken sexually harasses a poor, unsuspecting PR rep. As the Defamer says, “It’s going to take nothing less than full-motion video with penetration to kill those rumours, Clay.” But a nice try nonetheless.
Don’t forget to have a look at Friday night’s special edition of The Unbelievable Truth, an update on the Jessica Cutler story.


ALEXANDRA-KERRY

Alexandra Kerry

Here’s this week’s potpourri of flotsam and jetsam:
In Hollywood news: The Day After Tomorrow is on track to becoming the second film this month to top $100 million dollars in its opening weekend, with a Friday night opening gross of $24,300,000. Full details of the weekend box office will be published on VanRamblings on Sunday.
John Kerry, Democratic Presidential hopeful, would seem to have more than just Bushie to worry about on the road to the White House. Alexandra Kerry, his oldest daughter (that’s her to the right) could probably use some fashion advice — Paris, where are you when we need you? — given that she appears to be dressed in not quite the appropriate fashion one might expect of the daughter of the person who would be the next President of the United States.
Still, she does look kind of fetching, don’t you think?
Hello, world, I’m this totally famous actor, but don’t go and try and figure out who I am! Did I mention I’m nailing this actress whose name I can’t print?: So says the mysterious Rance, the anonymous A-list actor / author of the ‘cult blog du jour’, as he sets about to skewer Hollywood and the cult of celebrity. Is the anonymous blogger Ben Affleck, George Clooney, Jim Carrey, Benicio Del Toro, Matthew Perry, or Luke Wilson? Whatever the case, once Rance is finally outed (it’s only a matter of time), look for this Hollywood puzzle to become the next big story on the ’Net.
Good to know the people of Chicago are safe: Mayor Mark Delaney and Police Chief Chester Morris, responsible for upholding the law in the tiny Chicago burb of Maple Park, in Kane County, were arrested Friday night in an illegal-gambling raid that played out at a popular local tavern’s steak fry.


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Hooters calendar girls go to Afghanistan to cheer up the troops: That’ll make the wives back home feel a lot better, knowing that their husbands’ emotional lives are being taken care of while so very far, far away.
A New York City executive racks up $28,000 worth of champagne and lap dancing in a single evening.


ELIZABETH-JAGGER


Elizabeth Jagger

Rock ’n roll heaven among the progeny of rock’s royalty: Late Beatle John Lennon’s musician son Sean and model Elizabeth Jagger, daughter of Rolling Stone Mick Jagger, are dating. Confirmation of this comes from none other than Elizabeth’s mother, Jerry Hall. Sean is 28 and Elizabeth is 20. “They are so in love,” says Jerry of the couple.
A fun day at the fertility clinic when the doctor tells the clueless German couple that their childless state is a result of their never having had sex.
Quote of the week: “I’m still boning 18-year-old chicks because I was in Guns N’ Roses. It happens every day to me, so I’ll fucking take it as far as I can.” — sad commentary by Matt Sorum, drummer for Guns N’ Roses.